Uncertainty awoke with me every morning when I opened my eyes, pending doom lurked around every corner. Operating in a black out was mainly just part of my day and without more booze I was certain my nerves would kill me. I needed help for years, but I was too afraid to admit that I couldn’t control my alcoholism. My name is Dan Surette and I am an alcoholic.
Finally, the time came that I built up enough courage to ask the people, come to find I had been hurting the most, for help. With their help and by the grace of god they were able to find me a bed at a Detox Center in Portland Maine called Pinetree. Here is were I was first introduced to the Disease Model, the theory that helped me to see Alcoholism is a disease of the mind and of the body and that the only true cure was that of a spiritual awakening.
Though I felt better after my stay at the Pinetree Detox, I decided to make a commitment to myself that I would continue to search for direction and take advice. I did not want alcohol to control me anymore, I wanted to find a better way. I ended up going to a 1-month spiritual rehabilitation retreat in Plymouth NH called the Plymouth House. At the Plymouth House we dove right into studying more about the Disease Model, we learned how the mind has the obsession, the body has the allergy, and that there is a cure. We listened to stories of the staff/instructors that are living with the disease of addiction, we learned about the process they took and continue to take to get well, and we began to take the 12 steps of the Alcoholics Anonymous.
This is where I made the clear and honest decision to take a third step by turning my will and my life over to the care of God as I understood him. I became willing to rely on something other than myself to help me abstain from Alcohol, to realize there is so much more to life, and to believe that I owe this world something with out needing or wanting anything in return. I continued the process by writing a moral inventory of myself from as far back as I could remember to help me see the true nature of my wrongs. I asked god to free me of those defects in order to start to build with him a new future. One of honesty, one of vigorous action, one of compassion, and one to be a servant to help others in need to the best of my ability. I currently live in a 12-step sober home in Wilmington Mass name Michaels House in which every day we continue to work the steps, set goals, and challenge ourselves to help other.
If you ever find yourself in need of help, I can certainly point you in the right direction of what has been working for many of us.
I can be reached at DanSurette79@gmail.com
Daniel G. Surette